The past post I did on you at the hospital will be the last post while looking at you.

Two days ago, I woke up feeling lost. I stared at the ceiling and reached for my phone. I knew nothing much I could do to make my feeling disappear. 

I clicked on the Facebook. The message that came straight to my face is this:

I started crying reading this. I had hope mummy knows how much we love her. 

I would always wake her up in her sleep in the hospital to give her water. Every now and then, I would call her.. "Mummy!" until she opens her eyes or respond to me then I replied with a smile. "I Love You!" She would reply sleepily "Love You".

Even when she is in the Accident and Emergency Unit on the 23rd February 2022 morning. Even while she is gasping for air with the oxygen mask. I held her hands and told her.. "Mummy, I love you!" she replied "Love You".

I knew you will be worried of me. I'm sorry that I made you promised me not to leave me alone after daddy's passing. I knew you tried to hold on to your promise. Before your last breath. I whispered to her, "Mummy, it's ok. I know you tried to held on to your promise. I will not blame you for breaking the promise. I will forgive you. I don't want to see you in pain. I love you." 

"Do come back to see me, come to my dreams to tell me your stories as you've promised me you'll do. Come to my dreams so that I can still see you."... 

To this day, I have not dreamt of Mummy or did I feel her presence. Is she angry with me or is she unhappy with me for the things I did to her before her last breath?

I MISS YOU SO SO MUCH MUMMY!

I'm SORRY for all the things I did wrong to you.

𓆩♡𓆪